I hate myself...

due to some complications within my own computer, I actually could not send the presentation to my tutor in time... and she's going to cut our marks for that even though we had done a really good presentation the other time... sigh... what a fool I'm making myself to be...

I hate myself... why am I always so blur? (wait, I'm not always so blur but ever since JC started, when the work load started getting heavier, I've been forgetting about this and that every here and there) perhaps it's too much things going on in my life and I can't seem to handle it all? maybe I do need to cut down until I get the hang of things? but there's such a logic as to throw someone into the swimming pool to learn how to swim.. and another rebuttal would include: it's swimming, not competitive swimming... "(

if I want to succeed, I've got to come up with a better strategy than this, definitely... and if I need to stay in competition, I've got to give all I've got from now onwards, and the nerd institution I'm in would no longer be something I choose to take part in, but have no choice other than to include myself in...

no pain, no gain... no exercise, forget appetite, no planning and implementing, no successes happening...