pork chops? ha. nice...

I wonder what has pork chops got to do with me right now... but I'm seriously craving for some serious food... the waffles and cookies have gotten out of my favour... ;P and here I am, pretty much hungry and helpless because I do not have a choice but to stay since one of us is on leave and another has to tend to a client... so it's me and me alone.

great. the photo shoot's cancelled. i have been spending seriously too much money lately. over what is a good question. I wonder why and how myself. why it's so and how I managed to allow it to happen. a business student is supposed to be astute in her money management. argh.

so i dragged my makeup to work... having to drag it back later... haiz. I wonder if I can go for the camp thingy after my dinner appointment with daniel to discuss the articles and stuff... it could be too late. I don't know.

this week would be too much of a killer... taxi fare killer. my dad doesn't have the car and it's "oh oh" for me... and yes... killer week this has been... every day of work coupled with night meetings... rehearsals and etc. how i survived is a miracle.

and i'm honestly learning how to relax and learn to let go and let God... seems like I'm pretty much heck about the results for now... I hope it doesn't translate to laziness in the end. I want to have this balance of trying my very best and yet not hoping much for anything. as one can see and tell, it can be pretty much a degrading feeling when you do things like this... but a fool for the Lord I am. as long as one remembers, and knows, that it only seems senseless and folly for now... soon the whole picture wold be seen. the day of enlightenment would come... and when that day comes, you'll know that everything you've ever gone through and suffered for is worth it. it's a process, not an exact day of revelation.

anyone for soup with puff pastry? I think I'd go for country manna later. ha. the life... seems after taking up golf... I've been too much of a spendthrift... hehe... the tai tai makings? nah... I noticed that after thinking the big picture, and remembering to think of others in my prayer life as well as walk... i've been changing... big deal lots. for good since I now am a trifle more considerate and giving because I finally have taken my mind off worrying... of doing and doing and never reflecting. which makes me considerate to my very human wants. which can be a bad thing! haha...

but maybe that's all he wants me to do. dwell in his presence and heck the rest. they'd come in time. and develop the people to people skills and experiences rather than results for my future use. :)