Human or inhuman?

When i do actually look back at what i have felt and done, it seems all so odd yet familiar to me that a girl like me should be swinging from high emotions to evoking sad sentiments. I don't now how the mind connects with the heart as such and like that... but i have realised that it's a matter of the humanity of the heart and mind, and the inconsistency.

many have said that it's only human to err, but for so long i have felt that it was inhuman of me to think that way... to think that one shouldn't be accomplishing something which is very much within one's reach is inhuman... or is it? when you could reach out and touch someone but didn't, is it not inhuman? when you could have achieved what you set out to do to make your parents proud and do your best for God but didn't, is it not 'inhuman'? when we have done something similar of that sort of nature and yet fail at the next try, aren't we 'inhuman'? I say this because i used to think of ourselves as mini-computers that learn quick and fast.

it's an irony that as humans we always think that the most 'inhuman' things are the very things that we should accomplish. so why do i keep thinking the way i do? i honestly don't know... but i see it as vulnerable stages in life that leave me depressed about my lack of 'supposed accomplishments', questioning God, and coming back to what he has asked me to do instead.

perhaps imperfections has its merits.