why.

:) i cried like a baby today... broken. broken away from my burdens and expectations. from my unforgiveness of myself. from my unforgiveness i had towards God. from my unforgiveness from people whom i have always thought had a stake in my failures...

sister sharmini shared wonderful moments with us. every time i think that i have nothing to do with dance, God reinstates me once and again... although i wonder why - i have not touched dance for real since i was 5 or 6, and occasional dances don't really count do they? but in dance we use our whole bodies, making us more aware of using our whole beings to worship him... but i sensed so much within me that's unworthy and uncleansed... until sharmini prayed for me and shared with me that God wants me to bring to my friends in dance, love and joy. ironically i have never been known to possess either... so why? i don't know...

surely the flexibility i have retained somewhat has to come from somewhere... so i rationalised my joining the dance ministry... but that wasn't what he had in mind for me... seems like i have to minister to my sisters in song and piano... something i have been equipped with since young... and i am finally putting things all together... slowly but surely...

dancing in the spirit is wonderful. a little scary at first, but you feel beautiful inside. feel ministered to. feels good.